Bio-Poem: Sean O’Brien
Sean
Independent, Persistent, Forgiving, Thankful
Son of Gerry and Melinda, Brother of Claire, Leigh, and Devin
Lover of Harambe, Youtube, Family
Who feels thankful of food computers and Government
Who finds happiness in Keemstar, Video Games, and Food
Who needs Good friends, Happiness and Family
Who Gives Good advice, food, and good deeds
Who fears losing family, sharks and Tigers
Who would like to see Keemstar Hattles, having good grades, and a good school year
Who enjoys family, sports, and videogames
Who likes to wear t-shirts, shorts, and hats
Born in Easton Ct, Resident of Easton
O’Brien
I really liked the part where you described your love for keemstar and really emphasize it. I also enjoyed reading about how you like Harambe and i like how you capitalized his name. 😀
Sean,
I really liked your piece, especially the part about seeing a good school year and that you are a lover of YouTube. I would also like to see a good school year and I myself am a fan of YouTube. I really like the piece, but I have absolutely no clue what or who Keemstar is or who or what Harambe is, so… maybe you could’ve added more details about that. Also, maybe you could try add what videogames you like to play and who you like to play them with, or where you like to play them. Just by adding a few more details your writing will seem more advanced and will help readers feel/have a stronger connection. Overall though I loved the piece and I could still make some connections.
Emily
Hi Sean,
I really liked reading your poem. I thought it was really funny that you included “Lover of Harambe,” I have the same feelings as well. I can also say that I have the same feelings twards YouTube. Also I liked how you said “Who would like to have good grades”, that is an excellent goal. For upcoming peices make sure you use commas where they need to be.
Ben