Rachel
Energetic, considerate, joyful, and dependable
Daughter of Adam and Sheri, sister of Jordan
Lover of sports, the outdoors, and ice cream on summer nights
Who feels thankful for my family and friends, being able to have food for every meal, and a good education
Who finds happiness through relaxing at the beach, playing tennis, and bike rides
Who needs to be busy, my trampoline, and my soccer ball and cleats
Who gives love to family, time to sports and school work, and support to friends
Who fears being stranded in the ocean, death, and spiders
Who would like to see loved ones live happily, a world without violence, and different cultures in other countries
Who enjoys listening to music, long car rides, and winter nights with hot cocoa and a warm fire
Who likes to wear big sweatshirts and cozy sweatpants at home, a solid color or patterned top with jeans to school, and my gymnastics competition leotard
Born in Manhattan, resident of Easton
Horowitz
Rachel,
I liked how you put a lot of thought into your writing. I could tell that it took some time to think about what to write. I liked the part where you said ‘Who likes to wear big sweatshirts and cozy sweatpants at home, a solid color or patterned top with jeans to school’, because I know you and that is a clear explanation of what you wear. I wish there was more description in your writing, though. Otherwise, I think you did a great job!
-Stella
Rachel,
I really like your poem overall. I especially liked the part where you wrote, ‘Who likes to wear big sweatshirts and cozy sweatpants at home, a solid color or patterned top with jeans to school’ because that is really what I see you wearing all of the time. Something that could improve your writing would be to elaborate more and give specifics. Otherwise, I really like your writing.